`~`` Comments on Being Crazy``~`

(and rare findings)

Last week I decided I needed to do some cleaning of my possesions. Since I've been doing some cleaning in my life, I decided I also needed to clean myself of useless possesions and stuff that only takes up space.

I have SOOOOOOOOO much crap! I can't believe I keep so many things! I took out two trash bags of just papers! I'm a squirrell!

I went through all the papers I own... and I found a lot of stuff tht made me laugh, or smile. I found stuff that made me ache a little inside and I found a bunch of dreams I had written down on peaces of paper... What the hell do I smoke before bed? Man, some of these dreams are really wierd and scary... funny thing is that I've been recently been having similar dreams. I'm realy trying to put them out of my mind, but I need to talk to bicho first... maybe next tuesday.

Since last week I've had this urge to cry, I don't know why... but I want to cry so much.

In all the papers I found, I found a whole bunch of letters that people wrote me, but somewhere very strange I found a folded paper, with no name on it. I opend it and I recognized the writing. It was a letter from Edna, I started reding it because I had no recolection of ever seeing that letter. IT SAID THE DARNDEST THING! All I could think of was: WTF?! WTF?! She didn't even finish the letter, it's incomplete and it's not even signed by her, but she talks about Ruben and Olman, so ther's no denying that she wrote it, and at the very begining it's adressed to me.

How the hell that letter got where it was I have no idea... how the hell is it that I never read it, I don't know! :s but man that's screwed up! I can't believe I've had this... and... and.. if it's true... then... :S I AM SO FUCKING CONFUSED! WTF?!

And if that's not enugh, I find this little piece of paper that has this tiny little print with a wierd poem on it... So I decided I ws gonna look for Edna's box, the one Ruben gave to me to trhow way and I never could... and now its gone, I can't find it. I'm gonna look for it tomorrow when I'm tad more calm. Boxes don't just dissapear.

For now I will just focus on cleaning my room and getting rid of all the baggage I've mnaged to colect for myself the past decade. I need a good cleansing... I wanna talk to Olman, been thinking about him a whole lot this past month.

AremiBu