``~`Comments on new Friends`~``

(and shit like that)

Yesterday me and Erasmo where watching the starwars movies (Bicho lent them to us) and I was thnkfull that we started at episode IV, meant I would have a tad more time to prepare myself for episode III (that movie brings conflicts to my head), but mom decided it would be better if we explained to her the complex story line of starwars (my moms kinda slow) and Erasmo decided we should watch episode III THEN explain everything to her... dread.

Somehow that movie keeps taking me back to places I don't like to be. From the story to the fact of who I watched it with and the conversations we came to have afterwards.

Funny thing is, since me and Erasmo strted dating, we've had passionate disscusions about that same movie... and his point of view is so... unconventional, but I can't help feeling he's right, and that somehow makes me sad and scared....

So back to the movie, Anakin decides to go on a power trip, kills kids and I cry. My heart warmed up when Erasmo held me tight and wiped my tears... he kept asking me why I was crying, he kept asking what I felt. I could see the concern in his eyes, he hates to see me cry.

The day before we saw the movie we had been talking with the not so giant one (NG) and we had come to the arringment that we where gonna go play pool and hve some beers the next day, but of course, when the movie was over I had no desire to go anywhere, but we also had a birthday celebration (same place where I celebrated mine) and we couldn't just not go, cause they went to my bday.

I got ready and we left... it was raining. I remember I just took his face in my hands and kissed him thanking the gods for letting me have him by my side. When we got to K'chez we where having a very stupid conversation and he tells me: I am the one

Very stupidly I started giggling and said: You are the one to bring balance to the force!

HE: No, I am the one who brings blance to your life...

ME: ... ::He is so right... he is so sweet, I'm going to cry!::

HE: Why are you gonna cry again?!

He left me thinking the rest of the night about that conversation.

So we got to the new friends (my new friends, his oldones) and everyone was so nice as always, we started joking and laughing and drinking (I have come to love beer, the taste really grows on you) and then we started singing and dancing and Erasmo always sings to me the sweet romantic songs, so he ws sining to me, and he was looking in to my eyes xD then he grabs my butt... but I know it's his way of telling me he finds me hot and that he's a tad drunk, so I just laugh.

Then I tell him I love him and he just looks in to my eyes, smiles and says: I know...

Suddenly I'm not so afraid anymore...

To anyone who understnds the strwars stories:

I ussed to feel like... I was Padme and someone else was Anakin, things where so nice in the begining, so sweet, so perfect, then you go in to real life and... you bang and bang on the door but he keeps shuting you out, and you can see he's so scared he's drowning in himself so he starts acting all stupid and just ends up breaking your hert to the point where you feel like you've died and ther's no coming back.

That's why I kept on fighting with Erasmo about Padme and Anakin... I was so scared he would be Anakin all over again, because he's so like HIM sometimes.

And in that moment, when Erasmo looked in to my eyes like that, I knew he wasn't Anie... he was Hans... and I had the strength in me to make all the good in him come out, just like he brings the best of myself out. No more poor Padme that just sits nd waits for his man to come home, that just cries and begs him to let her in... no more weakness.

So I am calmer now. I really don't know what's gonna happen tomorrow, but I know I can stand by his side and both of us can build something together, something wonderfull.

I ended up having a great time... like everytime we go out. I ended up being able to dance with him like we'd never dnced before... we even had a little slowdance... the first. I really like his friends... their funny.

AremiBu

P.S.- In no way am I saying that my life is starwrs, I just relate in some ways to the chars, ok??